The Loli Invasion
by ZEREF
Summary: The Mayans predicted it, the Bible predicted it, Nostradamus predicted it, and those weird people who wear signboards said it was coming. 2012. No matter what people said or did, it came. The end of the world. The fact that the world ended is one thing. How, it ended was another. We, Kousuke and Yamato, now present to you; a story about the end of the world, The Loli Invasion.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Prologue

ZEREF: This is my newest fanfic, 'The Loli Invasion', a collaboration by myself and my friend, Heretik. Now, may Heretik do the disclaimer.

Heretik: This fanfic is not collaborated in any way with Good Smile Company, Bandai, Sony, Crypton, Kaki-

ZEREF: [Whacks Heretik on the head] What the hell! That's not how you do a disclaimer! You're about to give everyone massive spoilers, you third-rate lolicon!

Heretik: GAH! [Faints]

ZEREF: Retard. Fine, I'll do the disclaimer. I don't own anything that can be related to anything that exists in the real world. This is purely a work of fiction. Please don't take this too seriously. Most things that appear in this fanfic have no connection to anything in the real world.

* * *

2012. The fabled year of apocalypse, predicted and believed by many. Despite mankind's best efforts to prevent it, it came. Beginning in March 2012, Japan was suddenly met with a crisis. In the middle of the night, a giant, towering tower was erected in the middle of Tokyo. Then, they came. The lolis. No one knew who they were, or where they came from; but the people knew one thing: They were in deep shit. The lolis attacked. They ate anyone that wasn't an otaku. As for the otakus, several things happened to them. The female otakus were injected with a loli serum, turning them into lolis and overriding their brain with commands from their superiors. The male otakus were captured and turned into slaves for various purposes.

Now, I hear you ask, what happened to the Japanese armies? Well, they were completely decimated overnight. With the lolis' extremely huge arsenal of moe weaponry, the armies were killed by sheer moeness and violence. However, all was not lost. The stronger-willed male and female otakus (and non-otakus who weren't eaten yet) who were able to resist the moeness of the lolis started the Resistance. They fought back bravely. But still, their numbers decreased, day by day. Some were dragged away to be turned into slaves, more lolis or be eaten. Those that were deemed too dangerous were K.I.A. And those who couldn't take it anymore actually threw themselves at the lolis.

Sadly, by the end of March, only one-tenths of the Japanese Resistance remained. Despaired, they broke up, living in safe houses in groups of 3 or 4, occasionally doing acts of resistance and raiding places for food. But all in all, their primary motive had changed from 'Overthrowing the lolis' to 'Survival'. It was around that time when the Queen, who resided at the top of the tower (known as Loli Tower), made a news broadcast. At the same time all around the world, all televisions changed to show the same image. Black hair, black eyes and black clothes. Her name was Kuroyuri, and she was the Queen of lolis. She said-

"Now listen, you pitiful humans. I am Kuroyuri, the Queen of lolis. I have taken over the whole of Japan, and I shall take over the world! As a display of my power, I shall now destroy a country!"

Kuroyuri pulled out a cute pink button labeled 'Random Country Destroyer' and pressed it. Instantly, Sierra Leone blew up in a giant, pink, mushroom-cloud of moe smoke.

"Now, all of you shall become my loyal subjects or you shall be invaded!"

Kuroyuri contemplated this for a while, then gave a big smile and said-

"On second thoughts, I'll just invade you all and take over the world! It'll be more fun that way! Ja nee~"

And with that, the loli invasion began. You know the proverb, the bigger they are, the harder they fall? Well, the loli invasion proved that. The next to fall was the United States of America, followed by China, then England and Russia. One by one, the most powerful countries fell to the loli invasion. Then, when the important countries were completely invaded, they moved on to the smaller countries.

As the armies of the countries fell, numerous otaku and non-otaku Resistances sprung up all over the world, only to be crushed and trampled on by the lolis. It seemed like it was truly the end for humans. But humans are humans, after all. Some of them have miraculously strong wills. Now, Yamato and I present to you, our struggles throughout this dark time. This, is a story of bravery, friendship, love, moe, and random humor. This, is The Loli Invasion.

コウスケ

(Kousuke)


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2. Rain and Pillows

ZEREF: And here is Chapter 2 of 'The Loli Invasion'!

Heretik: Boo.

ZEREF: What.

Heretik: Booboo.

ZEREF: Shut up! [Pulls out gun] YOU WA SHOCK! [Fires]

[Fainted] Heretik: OW.

ZEREF: Retard. Ok, the disclaimer. I don't own anything, and neither does Heretik!

* * *

-Kousuke-

-Malaysia, Perak, Ipoh, 9th July 2012-

Wearing a black hoodie, a white t-shirt and black pants, I ducked into an alley.

"Keh…"

I watched as a pair of lolis walked past my hiding place. I sighed as I sat against the alley wall, making sure that I was completely obscured by a dumpster. The sky was grey and thunder was rumbling in the sky. Soon enough, a light rain started falling. I sighed as the rain pattered on the surface of my waterproof hoodie. It had been 4 months since the loli invasion began, and 2 months since they invaded Malaysia. After seeing Kuroyuri on TV, I met up with a few friends at school the next day to determine our next course of action. The first thing we did was take on aliases, in event of the invasion. I, the leader of the local Resistance, took on the name 'Kousuke' while my right-hand man took on the name 'Yamato."

We began stockpiling supplies in my house (it was to be our base) and through Yamato's connections (his uncle), we ordered weapons. Then, in early May, it began. The lolis invaded. For the first week, the ten of us did nothing. We just hid in my house, making plans and watching the news. My parents were probably eaten by the lolis already. Then, finally, after one week, the loli newscaster announced that the lolis had completely invaded Malaysia. That was our signal. However, things didn't go as planned. On our second day out, we met a large group of lolis. Two of us threw themselves at the lolis, while another two were forcefully captured. With our group of 10 dwindled down to 6, we were extremely disheartened.

Another week later, we finally found the local loli base in Perak, our home state. Tower Regency Hotel. However, it was not without sacrifice. We lost three more of our members in our attempt to locate the base. By that time, it was just me, Yamato, and his girlfriend, Yukio. We made an agreement, that we would never venture out of the house alone.

A few days later, calamity struck. Yamato was our sniper. He preferred to stay away from battle and shoot down lolis from afar. He was our sniper because he was good at it, and partially because he couldn't stand killing lolis up close. Unlike me, who had thrown away almost every ounce of moral conscience and would kill any loli up close without a second thought. I have even heard that the lolis actually called me names like 'Demon' and 'Akuma onii-chan'. They have even compared me to Alucard, that insane vampire and vampire slayer from 'Hellsing'. I was flattered.

Anyways, back to the previous topic. Yamato was hiding in a clump of bushes, as usual; when suddenly, a loli attempted to jump on him. But then, Yukio suddenly tackled the loli, sent her flying and went after her. Before Yamato could react, Yukio was knocked out and dragged off by a group of lolis.

For the rest of that week, Yamato went into depression. He didn't do anything at all. He was like an empty shell. Then, on 31st May 2012, I woke up to find that he was gone, leaving behind his prized, signature weapon, his Barrett M82A1 .50cal Anti Materiel Sniper Rifle and a note. He had left for Tower Regency Hotel to save Yukio. I simply waited. Finally, on that same evening, I received a text from him. It said-

"I'm sorry."

And so, the Resistance was dwindled down to a sole survivor. Me. I clenched my fist. I would get out of this, alive.

"Uh…huh?"

I opened my eyes. Did I fall asleep in the alleyway? That wasn't good. I was lucky that I wasn't attacked by any lolis. The rain seemed slightly heavier than before. And it looked like it was going to get heavier. With a sigh, I got up and decided to continue my mission for the day.

-Yamato-

-Tower Regency Hotel, Basement 2, Room No. -213-

"Ugh…"

I was lifelessly shoved back to my cell-room thingy by a pair of armed loli guards carrying M16A4 assault rifles that were drenched PINK. Heck, even the optics were replaced by moe bunnies. I wouldn't even touch one, for God's sake.

"Onii-chan, here's your dinner! Moe takoyaki~"

I groaned inwardly as a bunny plate piled with takoyaki was shoved at me. The food here sucked. As expected from meter-tall girls with hormonal disorders.

"You're telling me to eat this shit?"

*CRACK*

I dropped to the ground as the M16's metal buttstock found home in my head. My head didn't crack and bleed; instead, a big bump popped out. Ah, this would really take some getting used to…

"Onii-chan, you made me cry!"

The loli bitch pouted, and I fought every urge not to give in to those Yorkshire Terrier eyes. In a while, my composure returned, and I resumed being a good little slave while trying to plan my escape.

"Alright, alright, I'll eat it…shortie."

*CRACK* *BOOM*

The buttstock found home in my head again, and my bungalow was turned into a double-storey villa. Oh, and the 'boom' was from my pillow when I whacked the loli guard with it. But the pillow, obviously made at MOE Central in 'LoliAEON', burst into a puff of pillow-filling.

"Onii-chan~ you're bad~ you want to have a pillow fight? Come, Yuki-chan, let's play! Oh, and I forgive you for calling me shortie~"

And with that, the other loli guard stepped into the room and bolted the door. I gulped.

"Onii-chan, you only have one pillow…"

Suddenly, she noticed her M16A4 in her hands.

"I know, I'll use this! Here I come!"

I screamed as two M16A4s slammed into me like sledgehammers.

"One-nil to us! Whee~"

-Two hours later-

"That's game over~ One million five thousand nine hundred ninety-nine-nil to us!"

"Ugh…"

My whole body ached as I groaned.

"That was fun, onii-chan! Let's do this some other time!"  
The lolis left. Despite all my broken ribs and bones, I darted to my bed and hid under the covers.

"Mother of God…"


End file.
